“Socialist!”

That’s what was yelled at me as I sat at a traffic light near Union Station last Friday.

I’d just dropped off sprite an an hour too early for either of us. Our car bears only one bumper sticker: a circa 2004 “Dean for America” badge.

And one recently-arrived member of Glenn Beck’s idiot zombie army noticed the sticker and yelled the first thing that came to mind.

“Socialist!”

Amazingly coherent at the time, I turned to this guy and replied in kind:

“…and proud of it!”

This caused the idiot zombie to recoil for a few seconds, the pepper me with accusations that:

1. I must not understand the U.S. Constitution; and

2. I must not value freedom or being taxed without representation.

I addressed these in reverse order. Firstly, I asked him if he knew the full context of the Boston Tea Party, and whether he grasped that I, as a DC resident, was truly taxed without representation.

Again, he recoiled.

And then I told him that I respect his Constitutional right to express his beliefs and assemble peacefully with like-minded individuals. I also mentioned that he should respect my right to disagree.

(Did I mention that this was an 80-second light?)

And again, the idiot zombie recoiled in anger.

I then added, as the light was only seconds from turning green:

“Welcome to the District of Columbia. Enjoy our city, and please leave your money here.”

The final response?

“Socialist!”